Naiomi: "Hello and welcome to my festive cooking show. Normally I'm too busy to cook everyday so I make sure to do something special when the holidays come around. Since today is Halloween, I have dusted off an old crockpot to use for that old world ambiance and mystery. First I'll add these grade A+ brains, in perfect condition and such a pretty rose pink."
Naiomi: "In they go!"
*the ominous pot boils*
Naiomi: "Now add two robin's eggs."
Naiomi: "Make sure they are added whole, otherwise they will dry onto your cookware and it would take an ogre's strength to scrub it off."
Naiomi: "Next we have a little bit of sugar. You simply can't go wrong with sugar. It makes sweet things sweeter, bitter things better, and it has all the essential nutrients that DD's need. It's just basic nutrition my dearies."
Naiomi: "Woopsie daisy! The sugar bowl wasn't supposed to fall in. I guess I'll have to fish it out later. For the viewers at home, a spoonful of sugar will do just fine."
"I hope that doesn't affect my recipe too much... Oh well, that's just part of the fun in cooking!"
Naiomi: "Next we have some rainbow colored bone sprinkles kindly donated by my little brother. Why sprinkles? Can you think of a single reason why not? No? Neither could I. Make sure to sprinkle them into the pot so they don't stick together. Or was it you're not supposed to sprinkle them so the do stick together? Maybe sprinkle half, and then throw the rest in all at once."
Naiomi: "Oh, now I have the dish leftover. I'll add that too so the sugar bowl won't be lonely."
*The pot makes a large belching sound*
Naiomi: "Oh my! Well, that was a bit unexpected. Now don't be afraid to improvise with new recipes as long as you keep the general idea in mind. If it calls for a certain portion of an ingredient, like swamp moss, don't replace it with half as much of sea sprite spit or the recipe will never work."
*The pot burps again, spilling foam down the side*
Naiomi: "Next comes the shrunken skeleton. In most areas these are only available for a short time during the autumn season so grab them before they are sold out for the year. Bring an umbrella with you to the supermarket to fend off those old hags who cut in line last year just so they could keep the best skellies to themselves."
Naiomi: "In you go pipsqueak."
Naiomi: "Now for a little something I've been keeping under my hat."
Naiomi: "Be a nice little fella and hop into the pot."
Tiny Frog: *makes no move that may look like jumping and instead stares at the lovely green clad witch*
Naiomi: "Please?"
Tiny Frog: *pointedly he scoots in the direction away from the pot*
Naiomi: "Oh, well that's all right. I can just save you for later."
Tiny Frog: *happily he croaks* "Ke-ro-ro-ro-pi."
Naiomi: "Now, what was that last ingredient..."
Naiomi: "Ah yes, here it is! It's my secret ingredient! If you have your own special ingredient, this is the perfect time to add it."
Keroppi: *croaks*
Naiomi: "No, the box is not the secret ingredient my little fellow."
Keroppi: *croaks again and looks meaningfully at the box*
Naiomi: "But if I say what's in the box it won't be a secret. Shush now, I'm trying to make a cooking show."
Naiomi: "At last, everything is in the pot and almost ready."
*The pot begins to boil aggressively, spilling even more froth over the sides*
Keroppi: *croaks nervously*
Naiomi: "Take your strongest spoon and stir vigorously for half a minute in one direction and two minutes in the opposite direction."
Keroppi: *quickly retreats*
Naiomi: "My goodness! What happened to my spoon? It was rated for 5000 miles and had a warranty for up to ninety days, but that expired three weeks ago. Well, perhaps I can use it for a prop wand?"
Naiomi: "It seems a bit long but it could work as a gentleman's cane as well. "
Naiomi: "Oh bother, not again. I was sure this was the recipe for kettle corn. At least both my pots are the same size now."
Naiomi: "Well folks, now you know a foolproof way to shrink those heavy cauldrons into a more convenient portable size."
Naiomi: "Fancy that! It is like a crackerjack box with a prize inside. I wonder what it could be."
Naiomi: "An adorable little... apple? Well anyway, I'm sorry to say that our time is up and I hope you can join me next time. Have a Happy Halloween!"
"How in the Great Pumpkin does an apple come from all of that? I was sure that the gent in the grocery store said how no one could make kettle corn like his granny. The recipe did seem a bit odd, someone had doodled in the margins but they weren't a very good artist. Perhaps it is a candied apple now with all the sugar. A sweet, perfectly red little apple."
Keroppi: *suspiciously watches the remains of the mysterious spoon*
As for the stick-like spoon, it astutely maintained it's wooden expression.
... To Be Continued?
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